The Eeww Factor

Another surprise, especially since this never made the original Top Ten List.  However, I can’t very well move on into more explicit areas without talking about it.  Again.

 

There are many of us who suffer in the shadow of the Eeww Factor who perhaps might have been better served by paying closer attention to it before making a deeper commitment.  The Eeww factor is basically when a person is determined to live in an antiseptic environment and suffers from an inordinate fear of getting cooties from others.  In the popular TV show “Monk” the main character is a detective who has serious sensory and compulsive issues.  Among them is an intense fear of germs, bacteria and contamination.  We all should have some respect for biological agents that can make us sick.  We should bathe or shower, brush our teeth, wash our hands and otherwise keep clean.  However Monk’s inordinate fear of touching and being touched causes issues with his interpersonal relationships. 

 

Try to imagine what sex might be like with a Monk.  It would be trickier than two porcupines.  The fluids, the stickiness, the touching and the passing and exchanging of cooties would be too much.  And so it seems with many of our Low Libido people.  The idea of germs and fluids causes a lot of anxiety which inhibits their enjoyment of sex. 

 

The Eeww factor can kick in at any point that involves physical intimacy.  From kissing to oral sex to full on intercourse.  For those who are antiseptically inclined, there are serious issues to contend with.  In fact I might include any obsessive/compulsive here, where rules and regulations and schedules must be strictly adhered to.  But since we’re talking about a sort of sexual aversion, the dirtiness of it becomes an especially salient factor.

 

So recognizing this person before actually having sex shouldn’t be too difficult, right?  Yes and no.  Thing is, we all have our little issues.  For instance I don’t really like yogurt fir the simple reason that my imagination kicks in and I envision the bacterial load this stuff carries.  That’s the main reason people eat it is for the probiotic content.  I can stick my mouth and tongue in places where the sun seldom shines, but I just have issues with yogurt.  It’s just me and it’s all in my head.

 

My wife eats yogurt seemingly by the gallon.  And yet she lives in constant fear of bacteria, infection, germs and bodily fluids.  She’s the one who objects to various intimacies on the basis of hygiene and the Eeww factor.  In her mind, there is nothing more disgusting that someone else’s sweat.  So this would be a good place to start. 

Try going for a jog or going to the gym together with a perspective mate.  Then see if you can get a hug once you are both good and sweaty.  If you hear the word “Eeww!” you might be in for some issues later on.  Sex often involves sweat and if the partner is preoccupied with the Eeww factor, it is not going to be a very good time.

 

As I said, many of us live in the shadow of this issue.  Sex is impossible without a towel in the immediate vicinity.  Rather than linger and enjoy an afterglow, our partners are breaking the sound barrier in order to get to the shower and wash our stench from their bodies.  This factor accounts for some of the deep kissing and oral sex issues.  And this is not necessarily something that improves over time.  It can often get worse to the point where even the comingling of air causes issues.  If I’m looking for a relationship where we are comingling our bodies and their fluids together on a regular and frequent basis, it is wise to take a careful look at this factor.

 

D.  

 

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7 Responses to “The Eeww Factor”

  1. therese Says:

    I am obsessive about germs when it comes to Marcus Aurelius. My Mom always tended to be pretty germaphobic with us, too.

    But there really isn’t very much that grosses me out. I don’t personally associate sex with germs, although I’m not sure why I don’t because it makes sense that someone would. I guess for me, after having to help birth several farm animals (and inversely bring them to their eternal rest), there’s not much left for me to find disgusting in any situation!

  2. Confused Husband Says:

    Do you think that any reason for a towel present during sex is a problem? There is another reason besides the EEWWW factor. Not that it is gross or anything but really who wants to sleep in the “wetspot” afterwards? It gets cold! The only problem I have with it is that it takes away from the sponanaity of sex. So we don’t use one unless it is planned ahead of time.

    Summer don’t have any problems with germs or things like that. Unless of course I’m extremely sick like I am now. Then she wants to sleep out of the bedroom.
    CH

  3. FTN Says:

    Well Digger, now you’re just depressing me. Couldn’t you at least end the post with a nice, handy way of fixing the problem? Magically transforming a woman who has the “eww factor” into someone who suddenly loves and is in-tune with the male and female genital regions?

  4. diggerjones Says:

    I’m thinking Therese might have hit on your solution, FTN. Or at least get it to where it isn’t a worsening issue. And that would be to move to a farm and take care of animals to a point where pee and poop are more plentiful than air and dirt. My recommendations are either a hog confinement operation (where copious amounts of stuff are generated) or a milking operation. while the latter may not generate enough “Eeww-ness” for the desired flooding effect, it will entail enough other intimate-like activities as to lessen unnecessary aversions. For instance, have Autumn practice pregnancy checking cows. Or have a go at artificial insemination – the vet in Germany actually *blew* into his straw as opposed to using a syringe!

    In fact a field trip to an Artificial Insemination facility might be highly instructive. My favorite part is playing with the liquid nitrogen. Take the kids and learn the facts of life from some real experts!

    CH, the towel isn’t so much of a big deal except it has turned into an “every single time” deal. And I might could still live with this if it wasn’t for the whole “Eeeeewwww” thing that goes with it, that I’m pretty much excreting toxic waste with every orgasm and every thing must be disinfected as soon as possible to rid the universe of any trace of what just happened. We’re a society that has evolved into a total phobia when it comes to bodily fluids of any kind.

    Toxic waste, indeed!

    FYI – urine (wherever you happen to get it) is an effective way to get fire ants to either move or be dead.

    Don’t tell your spouses that, though.

    D.

  5. Cat Says:

    I was going to ask the same question about the towel because the wetspot does get cold and it is kind of a pain. Who wants to change the sheets everyday after all? But I understand now she just behaves as if it’s gross. It’s not the towel, it’s the atttitude she brings with it. Maybe moving to a farm is the answer. If it will render you sexually active again it might be worth it…

  6. 2amsomewhere Says:

    Rather than linger and enjoy an afterglow, our partners are breaking the sound barrier in order to get to the shower and wash our stench from their bodies. This factor accounts for some of the deep kissing and oral sex issues. And this is not necessarily something that improves over time.

    I hear echoes of this in my own situation, except that in my case, the Mrs. expects me to fetch a warm wet washcloth to clean up afterwards. And, yes, after almost 11 years of marriage, it has only gotten worse. At one point this fall, she suggested that we switch to using condoms to avoid the fluids altogether.


    2amsomewhere

  7. The Ow Factor « Unsolicited Advice: Wordpress Version Says:

    […] is obviously a companion to an earlier entry about the Eeww Factor.  I’ve seen a writer or two attempt to borrow and sample from that concept and rename it the […]

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